Some brides want to have a proper and elegant reception, while others want the festivities to feel light-hearted and happy; the difference is the absence and presence of kids. Figuring out what you want could be difficult. The fact of the matter is: if you decide to allow children to attend, it's your responsibility to make sure that there's some kind of diversion which can keep them occupied for a good portion of the ceremony and reception time.

Including your Own
Involving your own kids is a piece of cake. If they're old enough to follow simple directions, you can appoint them as flower girl and ring bearer. And don't be afraid to have more than one of each. You can have as many as you want, this is your wedding after all. If you're kids are old enough to spell their name and do mathematics – ushers. If you have a newborn, have the parent(s) who are walking you down the aisle carry him/her. This way they can still be an integral part of the ceremony.

Hire Babysitters
When it all comes down to it, allowing children to attend makes it easier on the families who want to be there, but can't find a babysitter. If you want those couples who have kids in tow to make it to the wedding but don't necessarily want the kids at the reception, hire a few sitters and designate a “kids room.” This way the parents can enjoy themselves at the wedding, you don't have to worry about children running amok on the dance floor, and the kids will be happier. Put together kid-friendly games and a menu (like Mac & Cheese or peanut butter and jelly sandwiches). Ask the parents what their kids like, what they're allergic too, and any other important details. Make sure that the “kids room” is in close vicinity to the reception so that the parents can check up on their tots if need be.

The Best Age
Another idea is to specifically invite kids who are over the age of 6. Any younger and you may be faced with tantrums and uncontrollable crying fits. 6 year-olds are typically well-behaved and can sit still for long periods of time. They are more mature and require less attention and amusement. If you can, offer babysitters and other alternatives for the underage youngsters. Make exceptions for newborns – you can't expect a mother who has just given birth to leave her baby. For these situations have a portable crib and private breast-feeding room available.

Give Them Something to Do
If you want kids to be at the wedding, it's always nice to let them participate. A popular idea is handing out bubbles which the children can open and play with at the end of the ceremony. This will add a nice touch to the concluding nuptials and will be the highlight of the kid's day. Another thought is to pass out small bags of rose petals which the girls can toss out on the aisle as they find their seats.

When to Let the Guests Know
Alert the guests on the kid rules in the wedding invitation. If you have anything special established - such as an on-site babysitter or playroom - let them know. You don't want to have to deal with any confusions over the phone, or have some parents bring their kids and others not. Also, if you're going to allow children from your family to come to the wedding, it's only proper etiquette that you allow everyone else to as well.